-Farzana Suri, Victory Coach
If the road to your success has bumpers, it can be disturbing. If you are looking for relief every weekend and dread Mondays or are overwhelmed with the anxiety of achieving your goals, you may need a mentor. Mentors are all around you. Your boss, a manager from another department, a companion on the train you take to work, your college professor, a family friend or a doctor.
Mentors are critical to your growth process. In fact, every mentor I had has left an indelible mark in my victory in life, personally and professionally. My mentors inspired me to think bigger, motivated me to keep going and aided me with the knowledge that would otherwise have required reams to pour through. They created a safe place for me to ask stupid questions and impacted my life in ways that made me who I am, today.
A mentor is your go-to person and gifted to you with the objective of enabling you to achieve your professional or personal goals. A mentor’s role is invaluable and he/she acts as a catalyst in discovering your hidden potential or areas that require some polish. A mentor provides you an objective perspective, of the lay of the land you may be operating in.
Some mentors walked into my life, as though they were meant to be. Some were assigned and some, I hired, professionally. There were also those who mentored me, indirectly. I trusted them with my fears, frustrations and their support has made me feel as though someone has my back.
We all want a mentor and, in my view, must have a mentor. You cannot demand mentorship. Mentorship is a relationship of contribution and equal participation.
I’ve been a coach and mentor much before I became a Victory Coach. In my previous avatar as an ad professional, I realised the value of having a mentor and being one. My mentors have been instrumental in my growth and my business. I have achieved more, quickly and more efficiently than if I had taken the journey, alone.
Who is a mentor?
A mentor is someone you trust, respect and believe. A person who is an expert and has the ability to see the meaning in your words and helps you articulate your dreams, ideas and aspirations. A mentor plays an integral role in moderating, facilitating, supporting, advising and guiding you with suggestions that are real and can take you closer to your goals.
What makes you an effective mentor?
- Be willing. It starts with the willingness to be one. You may be good at what you do however, having the ability to transfer that learning and invest time in doing so, is another story. The best performers have been known to stumble as mentors due to their inability to distil the information in layman’s language or lack of time.
- Be compassionate and caring. You are their teacher, facilitator, trusted friend and guide, all rolled into one. You are expected to be professional yet kind in your approach. Mentees can bloom in a positive environment.
- Be approachable and available. It rides high for a mentor. Mentees will learn better and faster from a mentor who is committed and makes them comfortable. It will allow them to ask questions that they may be afraid to ask, elsewhere.
- Be an active listener. It is the key to effective mentoring. The relationship is driven by the mentee and as mentor, your role is to hear them out, be a sounding board and confidant.
- Be prepared. Try not to ‘wing’ the conversations or meetings. Set a time, date, venue and encourage the mentee to do so, as well. Use structure and processes to leverage the time spent.
- Be tactful yet honest in your counsel. The mentee expects candidness however, you need not be harsh about it.
- Inspire, motivate and encourage and push mentees to engage with their goals.
- Be a role model. Because mentees are borrowing and following your lead.
- Never give up. Be the one who believes in your mentee.
What is the role of a mentee?
It is critical to remember that the mentee drives the mentoring process. In case, the mentee is disinterested in the process and does not embrace the program; it will never take off. A mentor-mentee relationship is a collaboration, a shared commitment. It is being done to help the mentee to reach his/her goal.
- Step in with an ‘I don’t know’ attitude. The ability and willingness to learn. Be flexible, receptive and honest.
- Be hungry. Do not be afraid to ask questions. Or disagree.
- Stay committed. The program is to help you raise the bar. Your commitment will drive your victory.
- Follow through. If you are given a task to do or an action required, implement it even if you feel you are pushed into the deep. Don’t expect to be spoon-fed.
- Seek feedback at intervals. The best way to assess your progress is through feedback and application.
- Stay focussed on ‘why am I here?’. You will get to where you belong, faster when your objective is clear.
- Apply the mentor’s knowledge not their way of doing it.
- Be respectful of the mentor’s time.
Make mentoring successful.
The mentoring process, if done with much thought can be gainful for the mentor, too. As a mentor, you get to see a perspective, you may have, missed. It may renew your bond, in the work you are involved in. You learn more when you teach.
The mentor-mentee relationship success can be measured through each interaction. Mentors who think they are doing a favour, will lose credibility. Mentees who think they know it all, never really, learn.
For the mentee, if you desire change and wish to develop your skills, a mentor is a great bet. Mentors are offering their time for free; imbibe and soak up all you can. Take notes, re-read them and repeat the actions that work for you. It’s a crash course to win at life.
It is similar to taking the ladder to your goals to achieve success instead of walking all the way, alone. However, the climb is all yours, either ways and, so is the victory.
Farzana Suri Victory Coach is a life coach and uses simple workable techniques to coaches you to lead a life of victory. You can connect with her on farzana@farzanasuri.com or www.farzanasuri.com
